I Need You Now
by gesika-is-rad
Summary: Puck made Kurt promise not to call... Rating is for a curse word or two.


**Hey guys. So this is my first Kurt/Puck fic. Hopefully I can get it right :) **I have no beta so all mistakes are mine****

**The song is "Need You Now" by Lady Antebellum.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

_Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor  
Reachin for the phone cause I can't fight it anymore  
And I wonder if I ever crossed your mind  
For me it happens all the time_

It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now  
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now  
And I don't know how I can do without  
I just need you now

Kurt knew this was a bad idea. He knew it was. But it was New Year's Eve, he was slightly tipsy, and he was snowed in; there was nothing else for him to do.

He should have just stayed in Lima for the week between Christmas and New Year's. That's what Finn, his best friend and roommate at NYU, had done. But no. He had decided to come back to school for that stupid audition and now look where he was. Alone, on New Year's Eve in New York City, in the middle of a blizzard. A fucking blizzard.

So with only his iPod and his champagne for company, Kurt had made an, admittedly, very bad decision. He'd gone into his closet, pulled the box from the back, and taken a walk down memory lane. Now two hours later, he was a wreck.

Spread around him were mementos from his junior year in high school. The year he'd spent loving, and being loved, by Noah Puckerman. Movie stubs, handwritten notes, cute doodles, even a crushed flower from the secret "prom" they had in Kurt's basement. That year had been the best year of Kurt's life.

It was Glee and an unwitting Mr. Shue that had brought them together. They'd been partnered together for the ballads assignment. They'd made a tentative agreement to be civil and from there, things had snowballed. Before Kurt knew it there were secret kisses, secret texts, secret calls, and a full blown secret relationship.

Kurt had known from the start that it had to be a secret. Puck was a bad ass football player who needed a scholarship to pay for college. He couldn't jeopardize that by loving a guy. And Kurt understood that. Puck needed a way to provide for his daughter; he needed to get out of Lima. Kurt willingly took a back seat to his boyfriend's baby girl. And since no college was gonna give a full ride to an openly gay football player they kept their feelings for each other to themselves.

Kurt could still picture every detail of the day that Puck signed his papers of intent with Tennessee. He'd never been so conflicted in his life. On one hand he was exceedingly proud of Puck. He'd done it. He'd cast off the Lima Loser shadow and was gonna make something of himself. He'd get out of this town, play college football, get a degree, and be the father he himself had never had.

On the other hand, Kurt knew that their relationship would have to end before Puck left for his first semester. Kurt could handle being a secret and he could even handle having a boyfriend states away, but he couldn't handle both. A secret, long-distance relationship was too much. He was going to have to give up Puck.

He had to hand it to Puck. If Kurt had any doubts about Puck's love for him, they were all washed away by Puck's refusal of the break-up. Puck had fought tooth and nail to keep them together, but Kurt stood strong. He knew that taking a secret relationship across state lines was a sure fire way to be discovered. It would be a million times more stressful and painful.

It was easy to ignore your boyfriend in the hallways when you knew that he was meeting you after the next class in the bathroom behind the auditorium. It didn't matter if girls threw themselves at him if you knew he would probably beat you to your house for some alone time before your father got home. It didn't matter if people thought you barely tolerated each other if he could "accidentally" brush your elbow with the back of his hand on his way to the pencil sharpener, or bump into you in the hall, or slap your ass on the football field; the gesture lost amidst the excitement of successful field goal celebration. It was those little touches, those brief affirmations of their love, that got Kurt through the day. And once Puck when to school they would be gone.

Without those reassurances, Kurt knew he would lose his mind to jealousy. The girls in Tennessee would have a much easier job of tempting Puck without Kurt there to erase the memory of their offers. They'd have his undivided attention. And Kurt would be riddled with jealousy and unease at not being there to remind Puck of who it was he loved.

So they broke up. Kurt promised that he'd never contact Puck and they went their separate ways. Puck's insistence for Kurt to leave him alone had thrown Kurt. He didn't understand why Puck was forcing that clause into their break-up. He had hoped that eventually they could be friends, but Puck was stopping that notion before it was even fully formed.

Four years later, drunk, alone, and surrounded by the physical evidence of their love Kurt was fighting a losing battle to not break that promise. He needed Puck. He picked up the phone and called the only number he had ever memorized.

* * *

_Another shot of whiskey can't stop looking at the door  
Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before  
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind  
To me it happens all the time_

It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now  
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now  
And I don't know how I can do without  
I just need you now

Puck was drunk. His New Year's celebration with Finn and the guys, held at a bar in downtown Lima, had ended about half an hour ago. He'd stumbled into his Mom's house just slightly buzzed, but he cracked open a bottle of Jack and now fully intoxicated. Intoxicated and thinking of Kurt.

He'd been shocked, and amazed, and terrified when he realized that his feelings for Kurt were romantic. He was the 18 year old stud of the Lima, Ohio cougher community. He had hooked up with all the Cheerios, including head Cheerio and president of the Celibacy Club, Quinn Fabray. He was expecting a child with Quinn. His Mom wouldn't settle for anything less that a "nice Jewish girl." He was the school badass. He had a reputation as a homophobic jerk.

But he was also in love with Kurt Hummel.

Kurt Hummel. Richest fashionista of the school. Prissiest kicker a football team had ever seen. Swishy and swayie, high voiced Kurt Hummel. Who would have thought that he would be the one to tie down Puck?

Somehow, he'd done it. Kurt had been infuriating, annoying, condescending, and rude, but somehow Puck had seen through all of that and found his Golden Boy.

They had only two real fights in their relationship. Well, three if you count their break-up. That was the only fight Puck lost.

The first battle was getting Kurt to believe that Puck really cared for him and wasn't just setting him up for a cruel joke. It had taken weeks of kind words, soft touches, and passed notes to convince Kurt to spend time alone with him. In all honesty, Puck hadn't minded the work; the payout had been huge.

Their second fight took place when Puck told Kurt he was going to be a father. He was sure that Kurt was going to walk away from him forever. Not that Puck could blame him. He'd knocked up his best friend's girl. Who would want to be with a guy like him? But after some tears that Puck was no longer scared to admit to, Kurt had seen how sincere he was about loving both Kurt and his daughter and released his anger. Well, not anger exactly. Apparently Kurt had just been scared of losing his place in Puck's life.

They never had a direct conversation about keeping things secret, it just kinda happened. Puck wanted to remain a God of the school and get a scholarship, so when Kurt ignored him in the halls and sneered at him in Glee practice, he just kinda went with it.

Then he got caught up in his senior year and all the craziness that brought along with it. Craziness that included college scouts. After some intense meetings and talking it out with his mom and Kurt, Puck decided on Tennessee. They had an amazing program and were offering him a full scholarship. Plus, he knew Kurt was aiming for New York City after graduating and figured this way they'd be on the same side of the country.

Not that he needed to worry about that. The day he signed his letter of intent with Tennessee, Kurt broke up with him. That was fight number three, the one Puck lost. The one that hurt the most. The one that literally changed his life. At first, Puck just refused to accept Kurt's leaving. He thought that if he just kept say that he didn't agree with the break-up Kurt would back down. Then he tried to make Kurt forget with sex. When that didn't work he just went back to denying Kurt's wishes of a easy split..

After going round and round for hours, Puck felt his heart crack down the center as he finally gave in to Kurt. He let his shoulders slump and hung his head as he asked Kurt why. Hearing that Kurt thought Puck would cheat on him had been the most painful moment in his life. He'd spent the last year showing Kurt how much he loved him and to have Kurt's (unfounded) insecurities thrown in his face was physically painful.

So Puck let him go. He asked for only one thing in return. Kurt had to promise that if he was really breaking up with him, he could never talk to him again. Puck knew he wouldn't be able to handle having Kurt in his life if he didn't have all of him. Complete severance of all ties was what Puck needed to get by. And Kurt had agreed. He'd had tears in his eyes when he'd done it, but he'd still agreed.

Sitting in his mom's living room all these years later, Puck thinks that promise may just be the biggest regret of his life. Maybe if he hadn't made Kurt promise to never speak to him again, they could have worked things out. Coulda gotten back together.

Puck only had one year of school left before he graduated with a Bachelor's degree in psychology. He was already planning on grad school in New York. If he and Kurt could have worked things out, they could be moving in together. They could be in love and happy and settled. Instead Puck was lonely and drunk on New Year's Eve.

Disgusted with himself for falling into these memories, he pushed himself up. It was time for bed and time to move on. As he made his way up the stairs, his cell rang. He pulled it out without looking to check the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"Noah? It's Kurt..."

_Guess I'd rather hurt than feel nothin at all_

It's a quarter after one I'm all alone and I need you now  
And I said I wouldn't call but I'm a little drunk and I need you now  
And I don't know how I can do without  
I just need you now  
I just need you now  
Ooo, baby, I need you now


End file.
